Steve Harvey’s advice to men about dating: “grow up, gotdammit!” I met a nice guy at a birthday party; we exchanged numbers. He texted occasionally with generic check-ins, even invited me to dinner by text, which felt lazy and uninterested. Texting instead of calling signals disinterest or evasiveness. When he later called, he demanded to know why I was avoiding him but gave no respect or proper greeting. I had to erase his number.

Many men have forgotten how to approach women properly. The classic move: walk over, introduce yourself with your real name, say something memorable. Nowadays, men wait for women to carry conversations or wave them over with weak openers like "what’s up?" I don’t respond to such signals anymore. Half-hearted attempts get half-hearted responses. The dating game requires effort — you can’t expect interest if you’re not genuinely engaging.

At a lively restaurant, a guy handed my friend a folded note saying “You’re cute, call me” with two phone numbers and then left. No charm, no real introduction, just a childish note. She laughed and ignored it. Approaching women with no personality or confidence won’t work. Men should come correct to make a lasting impression, not rely on lazy or gimmicky tactics in hopes of securing interest.

When a man approaches properly, asks for a number, and then calls with real interest, women remember. His wit or charm brings smiles in mundane moments. His call commands attention, even in a busy room, making her feel special. That’s the kind of reaction every man wants from a woman. It’s worth the effort to come correct—stop with the half-measures and “grow up, gotdammit!”